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Understanding and Compassion |
One thing that a lot of religions miss, really miss, is understanding and compassion in a relationship. Most religions raise people to believe that adultery and fornication are serious sins and if your mate commits one of those sins you are obligated out of self-respect to get a divorce. We in the Church of Reality promote understanding and compassion and working it out. People are not perfect and in order to make a relationship work you need to be forgiving and figure out how to make it work.
Divorce is far too common and the reason is in part that people give up too easily. People quit over things that they really should hang in there and work out. They take issues too seriously and make things more important than they need to be. Especially in relationships where children are involved. Sometimes you have to just suck it up, hang in there, and make it work out. Marriage and relationships are hard work but when a person makes a commitment - they should try to stick with it. Not to say that there is never a reason to get divorced - there sure is - but far too many marriages are wasted that can be salvaged.
In the Church of Reality we try a little harder than the other religions and we try to set an example of what reasonable people who believe in being realistic are supposed to act. (Not that I really know - but it seems like a good policy anyway.) We are a culture based on being innovative and creating solutions when most people would think they're unsolvable.
I get a lot of e-mail from people who feel like they must get divorced because the other person has sex with another person. These people think that is an unforgivable sin and that divorce is required. Yes - if you agree to monogamy and you break your word - it's a big deal. But it's not something that you can't get past, work it out, and save the relationship. Realists are people who can "get 'er done". We figure out how to make it work.
We are also a culture that believes in community and as a community we look out for each other and we help each other when relationships are in trouble. If the relationship can be saved we try to help people work it out and stay together. We look after each other and we try to take care of each other.
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